Features of the Introductory Paragraph
1. Hook/Attention-Getter (1 or 2 sentences)Click Me
2. Answering the Opposition / Counter-argument (1 or 2
sentences) Click Me Too
3. Divided Opinion/Thesis statement (1 sentence)
Example:
What happened on April 22, 1970,
to bring people all over the world together? That date marked the first
celebration of Earth Day. Every year since then, people in record - breaking
numbers have used April 22 to show their common concern for our environment. Some persons complain that "tree-huggers" have taken the celebration to distracting extremes; however, there have been positive initiatives to come from it. Therefore, our school needs to join the celebration by organizing a full schedule of Earth
Day activities as this will teach students about environmental issues, unite
the school community and bring awareness to the planet’s problems.
Features of the Concluding Paragraph
1. Restated Opinion Statement (1 sentence)
2. Call to action (1 or more sentences) Click Me
Example:
In conclusion, we can help to
make a difference in raising awareness for environmental and planetary issues
as well as unite communities by celebrating Earth Day at our school. If you
agree, write a letter to the school board or the administration today. All of
us take life from the earth. Now let’s give something back in return. So, earthlings,
unite!
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ReplyDeleteHook Effectiveness: The hook successfully grabs attention by referencing a specific date and event (Earth Day) that has universal relevance. It’s a great start to engage readers.
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Connection to the Audience: The question draws readers in, but it might be even more effective if it included an emotional appeal, such as how Earth Day impacts their daily lives or future.
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Counter-Argument Balance: The inclusion of a counter-argument ("tree-huggers" taking celebrations to extremes) is a good way to show consideration of opposing views. However, the phrasing might come off as dismissive. Reframing it more neutrally could strengthen the argument.
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Thesis Clarity: The thesis statement clearly outlines the argument in favor of organizing Earth Day activities. It’s concise and provides the structure for the discussion.
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Reasoning Depth: The thesis could benefit from specifying how these activities would unite the school community or address environmental issues for a more compelling case.
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Concluding Paragraph: The restated opinion is effective in tying the piece together, but the call to action ("write a letter to the school board or administration") could be more vivid by describing the potential impact of such letters.
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Tone: The tone is consistent throughout, though phrases like "earthlings, unite!" might feel overly informal for some audiences. Depending on the target group, this could either enhance relatability or detract from seriousness.
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Inclusivity: The content assumes that the audience is universally aligned with the environmental cause. A brief mention of the economic or social trade-offs involved in Earth Day initiatives could strengthen the balance.
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Overall Impact: The example effectively presents a case for Earth Day celebrations. However, adding more persuasive statistics or examples, like previous successful Earth Day activities, could make it more impactful and evidence-driven.
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